Things to consider and what it means for you and your guests!
We spend the majority of our lives connected to our world through our devices. Whether we're working all day on our laptop, scrolling on our phone during down-time, or even just the television running in the background of our daily life, we're always connected. There are very few moments that we are ever fully unplugged. It's crucial to make an effort to "unplug" and be truly present in the moments that matter most - and your wedding is a significant moment that matters to you and your family and friends!
From my experience photographing over 400 weddings, I’ve seen such a difference in the mood of the ceremony - and even the mood of the day - when couples choose to have an “unplugged” ceremony free of cameras and cell phones. Not always, of course. It all depends on you as a couple, and maybe you want every angle of the ceremony captured on guest cell phones… But for most couples, this time is very intimate. And asking their guests to experience that with them was one of the sweetest and most memorable times for everyone. Including this sappy photographer wiping away tears behind the camera.
Here are a few things to consider while you decide if an unplugged ceremony is right for your wedding day.
1. What does it mean to Be Fully Present?
It's easy to feel like a second-hand observer when we're behind a screen. We limit ourselves to what our handheld devices can capture, which is ultimately a small slice of the magnitude of what is occurring all around us.
By asking your guests to unplug and be fully present, you encourage them to experience the day with you and be part of the love you are feeling and wish to share with them, rather than simply watch it unfold through a device. You’re asking them to soak up all the emotion around them, and not worry about capturing what they can on their phones - but create new memories with you on your special day.
2. What Atmosphere are you Creating?
Distractions are everywhere, but phones offer a unique and constant source of distraction that can change the mood and energy in a room rather quickly. Removing phones and unplugging during your wedding encourages an atmosphere of connection and conversation that you can't achieve when everyone is busy looking at their phones. When you get your pictures back, do you want them of your guests celebrating and enjoying your day or down-turned faces towards their devices?
What do you want to see when you enter your wedding ceremony? Would you rather see your Soon-to-be Spouse on the verge of tears, and all your guests smiling back at you? Or would you rather look up and see a wall of cell phones pointed at you - guests looking down, and seeing you through their devices?
Do you really want to have that view of your soon-to-be spouse cluttered with cell phones reaching out into the aisle for the "perfect" cell phone shot? MY guess is you’d rather see that first scenario.
You've spend a year (or three) planning this day. You've hired a professional photographer, and possibly a videographer... So let them do the important job of capturing absolutely everything for you in a beautiful & professional way, and let your guests be FULLY present and enjoy every moment AS it's happening.
3. What kind of pictures do you want?
You've put a lot of time and effort into choosing a photographer who perfectly matches your style, personality, and needs. You've hired them to capture your day in the most beautiful way, and most photographers will be overjoyed at the opportunity to do so without interference. Ill-timed flashes or guests in the way of the perfect shot can all impact the photos you end up with.
When you look back at your wedding photos, is that quickly snapped out-of-focus shot from the back row going to tell the story of that moment? Will you even get to see that photo?
Ask your photographer ahead of time what their policy is for sharing your wedding photos with your friends & family. If this is something that means a lot to you - ask that your photographer allow access to your gallery so that your guests can share online (with proper credit given to your photographer) or order any prints they’d like to have from the day! Personally, I love sharing your wedding gallery with your family & friends, and giving them the chance to enjoy those memories all over again with you!
4. What about Privacy?
Are you the type of person who posts your life from the moment you wake up until the moment you fall asleep, sharing everything in between? Or is your online presence mostly non-existent? Somewhere in between?
Consider your feelings about not only your privacy online but also your guests! The pictures your guests take belong to them, and though you can ask that they not be shared until you share your professional photos - or at least get your sneak peek from your photographer - you ultimately cannot control what is posted or who it is shared with. If you or your guests place particular value on privacy, having an unplugged wedding can help alleviate many privacy concerns.
If you've decided that an unplugged wedding is right for you, there are several different ways to inform your guest of your decision! There's no one right way to do it - some methods may be more effective than others, but if in doubt, utilize multiple approaches!
Put a note on your wedding website or invitation!
Putting a note on your wedding website or a special insert card with your invitation is a great way to let your guests know early on what to expect. Unplugged weddings have been popular for years, so it shouldn't take guests by complete surprise, but knowing about it ahead of time still gives your guests the opportunity to learn more about it before the big day.
Place a sign at your ceremony!
Signs are one of the most popular ways to remind guests to unplug during the ceremony. With hundreds of different wordings, you can find a sign that fits the theme, style, and vibe of your wedding.
Make it short and sweet, or something funny. Write a little poem or keep it professional. It’s up to you how you choose to tell your guests. I suggest having one professionally done, to fit the aesthetic of your day!
If you’re hiring someone to make signs, or if you have a wedding coordinator, I’m sure they have done these before! Your venue may even have one to set out for you!
Have your officiant make an announcement!
You and your partner can let your guests know that you're going to be doing an 'unplugged ceremony' by having your officiant announce it just before you're about to start.
Guests who might have missed the memo (or the sign) will get the direction when they need it most, and everyone can relax and settle in before the ceremony begins.
Make sure that the announcement makes it very clear what and why you’re asking for this.
For example, you could have your Officiant say something along the lines of: “Good evening, Just a quick announcement. The couple wishes to have an Unplugged Ceremony, meaning they’re asking you to put your cameras and cell phones away and enjoy the ceremony. They wish for you to be fully present in making new memories with them during the ceremony. But you’re welcome to use your cameras again at the reception.”
Easy Peasy!
I hope this clarifies any confusion or question around exactly what an Unplugged Ceremony is, why I think you’ll love it, and how to incorporate this element into your perfect day!
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Thanks for reading!